My husband and I have always played a game when watching the Underbelly series, well more of a wager. We bet on how far into the episode we will get our first glimpse of boobs. The loser has to make school lunches for a week. The winner gets a massage.

In Underbelly Razor, it appears we won’t have to wait long with a fantastic bath scene for our viewing pleasure almost immediately. I won’t be letting my husband in on this snippet of information obviously. Making school lunches are the bane of my existence and I could really do with a massage.

Channel Nine has promised us that Razor will return us to the original and best kind of Underbelly. The kind where we were startled by the storyline and had a genuine interest in getting to know the real story behind what show we were watching.

This time round, the story revolves around inner Sydney in the 1920s and in particular the battle between Tilly Devine and Kate Leigh’s fight to gain control of the flourishing gambling, extortion, prostitution and illegal drug trades.

There will be stand over men. There will be pimps, thugs and gunmen. And there will be sex. The scenery and costume already look amazing and I must admit I am looking forward to getting lost in this era.

This has been based on the book, Razor, by Larry Writer.

“Underbelly Razor will bring to life Australia’s two famed vice queens along with infamous gangsters Norman Bruhn Guido Calletti, Big Jim Devine, Squizzy Taylor, Phil “the Jew” Jeffs, John “Snowy” Cutmore and Frank “the Little Gunman” Green.

Starring Danielle Cormack as Kate Leigh, Chelsie Preston Crayford as Tilly Devine alongside a stellar cast that includes Jeremy Lindsay Taylor, Jack Campbell, Steve Le Marquand, John Batchelor, Felix Williamson, Khan Chittenden and newcomer Anna McGahan as delectable prostitute, Nellie Cameron.”

Of course, the best thing Channel Nine has done so far is to use Adele’s Rolling in the Deep as the song to promote their series. It makes you pay attention. Let’s hope it lives up to the hype.

Underbelly Razor – Sunday 8.30pm – Channel Nine.

The Block returns this week for 2011 and from what I’ve seen so far, we are in for quite the ride.

This year though, there are a few changes. They’ve shaken things up a little and the stakes are a lot higher. No longer will the couples be renovating a unit, but an entire house. In fact, they will be making over four workers cottages, 10 minutes out of Melbourne city, that have been described as a “renovator’s nightmare.”

First things first though. Curve ball number one.  Initially there are eight couples yet only four spots available on the show. To determine who those four couples will be, there are a series of “super challenges” where couples are paired off in competition with one another. The couple’s are then given a stark white room, $5,000 and 24 hours in which to transform the rooms into any kind of area they so desire.  They are each given an item such as a lamp, chair or table and prompted to work around them for inspiration. The two couples are then judged against one another on their design, functionality and execution.

For my money, I hope they take into account the best personalities because that’s what the viewers will return for. A brilliant room is one thing; a contestant that can make us respectfully love or despise them is another.

The initial eight couples are:

Chrissie & Toby – Married

Polly & Waz – Together 3 years

Katrina & Amie – Sisters

Laura & Emily – Identical Twin Sisters

Shannon & Aaron – Together 5 years

Jenna & Josh – Together 5 years

Carrie & Chris – Married

Tania & Rod – Married

Over four nights you’ll see these eight couples battle it out for a spot on The Block. You’ll get to see them forget to take essential items home from the store, sing off key, generally lose their minds and design some very funky spaces. Melbourne also gets one hell of an advertisement, looking picture perfect and very accommodating in the retail sector.

For mine, I hope the identical twin sisters (for the drama factor) and Chrissie & Toby make it through. They are the best value for money. Whether their rooms were better, well, no I don’t think they necessarily were, but time will tell which four couples make it onto the block and stand a chance to make some serious cash when the houses they renovate are completed and go to auction.

If you think The Block lost its way in the last series, you might want to give another chance this year.

The Block:

Channel 9

Starts Monday 20^th June 7pm.

It’s kind of an Australian National past time to bag on the Logies. The Logies, being the annual awards ceremony celebrating and rewarding Australian televisions best and brightest.

But geez, it is often 5 hours of your life you will just never get back. And even though there were moments of brilliance like KD Lang singing Hallelujah (albeit shoeless), or Shaun Micallef using the Oscar acceptance speech of Sir Laurence Olivier as his own, there were far more awkward and embarrassing moments than wondrous.

The Logies actually remind me of being little and settling down for a big night in with my Mum who absolutely adored this event. These were the days of Don Lane and Bert Newton. Of Molly and Brendan and Bobby and Frank. These were different days. These were the days, and I guess I may be romanticising, that on the spot talent was limitless. Nowadays it feels like we have so little live, fly by the seat of your pants, talent. Gretel Killeen anyone?

Plus, let’s be honest, we are all really tuning in, just hoping for another Karl Stefanovic/late to bed/early to rise/plastered moment on the Today show. I’m guessing Channel 9 more than most, such was the ratings bonanza. Sadly, he kept a lid on it this year and was his usual self the morning after. Borza. At least Claudia Karvan didn’t let the team down with not only a nipple slip, but also a liberal dropping of the f bomb.

Channel 9 got to host the Logies this year and as such, there was a fair bit of overkill with the usual suspects. Jules Lund (who just quietly needs to lay off the spray tan and bleached tips), Richard Wilkins (ditto), Ruby Rose (now with all new blue-rinse) and Natalie Gruzlewski (Channel 9’s female answer to Eddie McGuire).

Sadly, I failed to recognise at least half of the “stars”. Perhaps because a fair few of them have zero to do with actual Australian Television. Brynn Gordon? The chick who married the ultimate sugar daddy and who’s biggest claim to fame was wearing a revealing dress at some footy awards? Really? The kids for the new Hi-5 walked down the red carpet and my whole family said in Unison “Who the hell are those brightly coloured weirdos?” I would say at least half the people shown on the red carpet, or who were up for nomination, were people I had never heard of before.

The ceremony itself was hosted by Bert Newton, legend of Television. I think anyone over the age of 30 digs Bert, below that, they don’t just don’t understand his awesomeness. Although hosting would be stretching the term somewhat. He even mentioned himself that next year, he’d be bringing “some knitting” to do out back as he really had so little to do. It was all about the presenters doing most of the work. Bert was Bert, but he was a little off. Other things on his mind perhaps? Probably his best line of the night was “We are off to a commercial break, here’s Moira”.

Shaun Micallef stole the show with both acceptance speech and presenting his awards and many called for him to present next years Logies.

There were touching moments of course, including inducting Brian Naylor (Iconic Newsreader who tragically died along with his wife, in the Black Saturday fires) into The Hall of Fame. So too the “In memoriam” montage of actors who had passed away throughout the year. Sadly, it was like a popular-o-meter with some actors getting zero applause whilst others got standing ovations. Poor form by the Logies audience.

There were awkward moments with The Bondi Rescue boys saying something about winning the award “again” being quite predictable. The audience turned on them. Also, I think most of the viewing public had a WTF? moment when Rebecca Gibney declared she was premenstrual and suitably crying towards the end of her acceptance speech.

Also of note were the Myer minutes, commandeered by Natalie Gruzlewski and Richard Wilkins. Umm, perhaps Channel 9 better get some new clocks, because they were the longest minutes in history.

Of course, every year, we ship in an overseas guest artist to perform. Why, when we have such brilliant talent here, is beyond me. Perhaps Aussie artists have the heads up and refuse, whilst we can rope in an oblivious big name act overseas act? This year it was KD Lang and John Mayer. KD was brilliant, John Mayer, meh…. Also Gabriella Chilmi, that 18 year old gorgeous and talented young lady, gave a great performance at the beginning of the night and thank the lord, it wasn’t her woman on a mission song.

Ruby Rose was also a talking point with her new hairstyle. Was it a nanna bluerinse gone wrong? Had she deliberately dyed her hair grey? Either way, she’s still a very beautiful girl and held up her end of the red carpet interviewing.

And look, we could discuss the red carpet fashions all day. Hang on, no we can’t, because, to be honest, no one really had a shocker. Sadly.

Twitter got overtaken with tweets of the Logies much to many peoples dismay. Often times, it was downright nasty and bordering on vicious.

Here are some samples of the tamer and more enjoyable tweets on the night:

@adamrichard #logies boring without Shelly Craft’s nipple

@remued Hugh Sheridan’s satin suit looks highly flammable #logies

@mistergjones: “I think I’m pre-menstrual.” Only on Australian TV. We are ALL class down-the-f*&k-under. #logies

@adamrichard I hate when they snub someone from the deady bones montage – where was lara bingle’s “career”? #logies

@wadekingsley Bert could drop a turd on stage and get a standing ovation #logies

@emilybwebb Get used to your hair looking like that everyday once the baby arrives, Nat. Frightfest! #logies (on Natalie Bassingthwaites hair)

@sammy_roberts22 sitting here, waiting for @johncmayer to perform on the logies. He’s pretty much the only reason I am watching it

So after 4.5 hours, we were finally graced with the very deserving winner – Alf from Home and Away, wait, I mean, Ray Meagher. He was gracious and humbled. Perfect winner.

Full list of winners for the 52nd annual Logie Awards
GOLD LOGIE – Ray Meagher, Home and Away (Seven)

SILVER LOGIE (Popular Awards)

Most Popular Actor – Hugh Sheridan, Packed to the Rafters (Seven)

Most Popular Actress – Rebecca Gibney, Packed to the Rafters (Seven)

Most Popular Drama – Packed to the Rafters (Seven)

Most Popular Presenter – Shaun Micallef, Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation (Ten)

Most Popular Reality Program – MasterChef Australia (Ten)

Most Popular Lifestyle Program – Better Homes and Gardens (Seven)

Most Popular Light Entertainment – Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation (Ten)

Most Popular Sports Program – The Footy Show NRL (Nine)

Most Popular Factual Program – Bondi Rescue (Ten)

Most Popular New Male Talent – Luke Mitchell, Home and Away (Seven)

Most Popular New Female Talent – Carrie Bickmore, The 7pm Project (Ten)

SILVER LOGIE (Outstanding Awards)

Outstanding Children’s Program – My Place (ABC)

Outstanding Factual Program – Law and Disorder (SBS)

Graham Kennedy Award for Outstanding New Talent – Matt Preston, MasterChef Australia (Ten)

Outstanding News Coverage – Victorian Bushfires (Seven)

Outstanding Public Affairs Report – Code of Silence, Four Corners (ABC)

Outstanding Sports Coverage – V8 Supercars: Supercheap Auto Bathurst (Seven)

Outstanding Light Entertainment – Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation (Ten)

Outstanding Drama Series, Mini-series or Telemovie – East West 101 (SBS)

Outstanding Actress – Claudia Karvan, Saved (SBS)

Outstanding Actor – Don Hany, East West 101 (SBS)

For the Logies fashion winners and losers, visit the fashion playground

Did you catch it?  What did you think?  Personally, I thought it was pretty terrible.  But then I’m a married 34 year old woman who chooses her footy tips based on the cutest mascot. 

But in all seriousness, this jazzed up version of the 9:30pm Channel 9 Footy Show is weak and well, just not funny.  Humour was thin on the ground  which is unfortunate as I’m sure that was their major aim,  based on the amount of skits they tried to jam pack into an hour.  Matthew has fellow former footballer, Shane Webcke as he wingman and notable former celibate footy player, Jason Stevens asking the hard questions. This week Jason seemed quite comfortable speaking with a slightly off tap singer,  Ke$ha.

This show rated really well, especially in Sydney.  Was it because people were curious?  I think so, but then again, there were tons of positive responses on Twitter in real time,  saying they loved it and thought Matty Johns was hilarious.    It absolutely blew the original Footy Show out of the water based on numbers, but then again, they are two completely different timeslots, with two very different sets of viewers.    Next week, it will go head to head with the local AFL shows in the lower states.  That’s when its mettle will be severely tested.

The thing is, Matty Johns basically was the Channel 9 footy show, with  Reg Regan being his biggest success.  His Don Bourke spoof, “Don Kirk” was only slightly funny and just made me miss the days of Reg all that more.

Then, well, there was that unfortunate incident where he alledgedly pack-raped a young lady in New Zealand and unceremoniously got the flick.  Now Channel 7, in their infinite wisdom, didn’t just let him back on TV, they graced him with his own TV show.  How freaking lucky is that?  This guy, regardless of talent, did a very bad thing.  No two ways about it.  To celebrate that, they rewarded him with something most entertainers could only dream of.   I agreed with  Luke Bradnam of Hot Tomato this week when he said, if he had of come out and seriously, just for a minute, talked frankly about his comeback, his feud with his brother and what he has been up to since his fall from grace, he, and the rest of Australia, would have not only appreciated it, but would have been glued.   Anyway, I digress, this is about the show. 

I’m guessing the true test will be week 2 and also week 3.  Week one just tested the water. Were there enough people ready to watch a show about footy boofheads taking the piss at 7:30 on a Thursday night?  Last week yes, this week, time will tell.

The Matty Johns Show – Thursdays 7:30pm – Channel 7.

It was a night of glamour as I entered the 102.9 Hot Tomato Star Party at Jupiters Hotel & Casino on Friday night behind the gorgeous Hayley Bateup and her partner. Hayley dressed in a short stunning black number with the most fluorescent of Hot Pink heels seemed to strike a remarkable resemblance to the Rock Star P!NK.

Once inside there was every type of fashion imaginable. As I scanned the room one corner looked like a year 12 formal, the other like a nightclub in Surfers – that’s the beauty of Fashion, it is for everyone and it certainly is open to interpretation!!!

I must say Shannon Eckstein and his partner Belinda, Bede Durbidge and his wife and of course the glamorous Ms Bateup and partner all looked gorgeous. Sometimes professional athletes struggle when glaming it up but these guys had it perfected.

For those wanting to rub shoulder with some of Ch 9’s most talented there were plenty of opportunities.. Mr Dieter Brummer, Gyton Grantley (aka Carl Williams from underbelly – who might I add looked very handsome) and Peter Phelps.  If only I could mention everyone. My favourite dress of the night was that worn by gorgeous Eva Milic. She has such a simple and natural class about her and looked stunning.

But..…… the man that stole the light (other than Luke Bradman who stripped down to budgie smugglers and a lifesavers red and yellow cap later in the evening as he belted out a couple of tunes) was Mr Warwick Capper. Making a very traditional entrance poking the sky with his fingers….he was the man! Although to my surprise he was sporting a rather different look. No mullet, in fact he presented with freshly bleached foils, manicured and immaculately blow-dried hair – a very different and new look. Check out all the pictures here

Well done to the Hot Tomato and Conrad Jupiter’s team for putting on a Fabulous night. The Marque and entertainment certainly gave Cirque de Soleil a run for their money; the only difference being these were tickets money just couldn’t buy.