Most mornings I take a walk down to the beach and this morning was no different. It’s the time that I use to wake myself up and slowly move into my day. It’s generally pretty peaceful. But this morning was a little different. This morning I was accosted by what most parents would be familiar with at this time of the year … Crazy kids on scooters and push bikes screaming, clearly loving that another day with no school has started!

While I’m not a parent, I do have a business. And seeing those kids running at me as their grandmother chased them down the road made me think that there’s probably a lot of similarities between business owners and parents.

There are just some times when I feel like I’m continually chasing. When life becomes a little overwhelming due to the number of great ideas in my head, or because I have said I could meet with more people than I can physically handle. And I know that everyone’s stress buttons are different.

Here’s the thing. Just by taking a breath and stepping back for 10 minutes, I’ve realised that it is possible to get in control. As such, after a lot of my own tail-chasing, I have come up with four key principles to overcoming being overwhelmed in life or business.

1. Projection: Have a plan for the day, next few months or few years so that you know which direction you really want to go – and then write it down. In business this may be your forecast; and in life it may be a family holiday, some savings, or just to sit down each day for dinner with your family.
2. Priorities: Take five minutes to dump everything from your head onto a piece of paper, grab your Projection from Step 1 and work out which of those activities bring you closer to achieving that today. Be prepared to not get EVERYTHING done.
3. Premium: Ensure that you see yourself with as much value as everyone who relies on you. If you’re over-demanded in business, learn to delegate or raise your prices. And if you’re stressed out at home, be prepared to say NO to someone, or something, in order to do what you really want at least once a day.
4. Personal Responsibility: Be prepared to take responsibility for your life’s outcomes. If you’re feeling stressed out because you’ve committed to one too many things right now, make a change. How can you give to others if you are not first giving to yourself?

While the headings seem a little business-focused, I challenge you to apply the thinking behind the bullet points to your life and see what happens. And if you want to immerse yourself in this thinking for a day – come join us on July 14 for our Get on Purpose Seminar.

Let me know your results!

We use many tools in our business to help people get where they want to be – to help them reach their own measure of success.  Actually, we have a whole sack of them, because what works for you doesn’t always work for someone else.  Regardless of this, at some point along a person’s coaching journey there is the question:  Is this right?  Is that the right answer?  Am I on the right track?

A mentor would probably answer:  Did you follow the instruction?  Are you getting results?  Test and measure it.

A friend might say: Of course, you’re doing great!

A spouse may add:  I love you regardless of whether it’s right or wrong.

But, did any of those answers actually help you feel any more secure in your direction or decision?

The truth is that there are hundreds-of-thousands of ways to grow and build your business.  And there are that amount of people again out there offering solutions on how to do this.  The fact of the matter is, none of them is offering a way that is more right than the next way.  They are simply offering solutions to help you decide what is Right for You.

How you do business is all about how every element of your business makes you feel.  It’s all about finding methods that align with your personal values and personality.  It’s about finding something that puts you on that path you are aiming for while helping you retain happiness.  What are the techniques that allow you to act with integrity while producing outstanding results?

So, rather than looking outside for an understanding of whether you’re on the right track, how about being your own coach for a second.  Ask yourself what we would ask you:  AM I on the right track?  How do I feel about my decision?  Am I getting the results that I desire?  Then, sit and wait for the answer.  You’ll know it.  You will always know it.

RECENTLY my partner celebrated his official divorce from a 17-year military career.  It was a big deal in our house, and not just because I no longer get to see him in uniform (though that is a big deal in my books!), nor because he now has to find something other than khaki colour to wear everyday.

It’s been a big deal, because now he has full reign on all his life decisions.  Mmm, yes, big deal.

You see, he has lived his entire adult life under someone else’s rules, regulations, command and obligations.  He was told what things were important to him; what sort of qualities make him a ‘good’ man; where he would live next; and what sort of relationships are agreeable within the walls of his community.  Sounds vaguely like being a teenager again, right?  The military was clearly wearing the pants in his house.

Don’t get me wrong, this life provided him with great opportunity, purpose and direction.  But, here’s the deal, at some point someone else’s rules, regulations and command – let’s call them Values – stopped fitting for him.  It’s at this point he had to work out what does best fit for him. He had to design and wear his own pants.

The Catholics created the 10 Commandments to guide believers through life, to help them choose the best direction for their actions.  Just as the military created their core values for my partner to serve under, to help him choose in a life or death situation.  To aid him in knowing what is the right path for all his actions.

Who has affected your chosen path?  Who’s rules (or expectations) are you operating under?  And more to the point, are they getting you the results that you so desire?

Values represent what we stand for.  They tell us which way is True North.  They make decisions easy.  Dare to design and wear your own pants.

“When you live according to your highest values you become inspired and awaken genius. When you live according to your lower values you require continuous outside motivation and you sedate your genius.” – Dr John DeMartini

Nope, it’s not a 10 Commandment, but as we approach Mother’s Day it might be a good time to request that it be added.

Too often in my role as a coach do I hear someone say they are ‘just a ‘. The word ‘just’ automatically plays down that person’s significance. The word ‘just’ suggests that what they are doing is holding them back from their real hopes and dreams, because they are ‘just a ….’. Given today’s topic, let’s go with ‘just a mother’.

What this person fails to recognise is the significance of being a mother. As Dr John DeMartini suggests, they fail to recognise the value they bring to the world by raising children to be educated, confident and aware of the world around them. They fail to recognise they could be raising a family of world leaders.

By shifting your perceptions and honouring the significance of being a mother, you increase your perceived self worth, sense of fulfilment and inspiration.

So, regardless of your ‘just …’ title, take some time today to recognise what it is that you bring to those people around you everyday. Take some time to think about the flow-on affects of that thing you ‘just’ do everyday. Then, make a conscious effort to HONOUR your own significance.

Well, the short answer is of course, you.  But new research out yesterday suggests that maybe our friends are responsible for the few extra kilos we might be carrying around.  And not because they have physically put it on us, but if they’re overweight, just being in their presence for extended periods can encourage us to let our own food intake increase.

But here’s the thing, this sort of thinking is not new.  Motivational speaker and educator of personal development Jim Rohn said many years ago: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”  Which to me suggests: Those five people with whom you spend the most time affect everything about you – weight and wealth included.

The concept works on two levels of consciousness – conscious and subconscious – suggesting that we attract what it is that we believe ourselves to be worthy of.

And this is what Robert Kiyosaki echoes in his book Rich Dad, Poor Dad (published in 2001).  He had two dads – his poor dad, stuck in the middle-class with limiting viewpoints on money; and his rich dad, one of the wealthiest men in Hawaii who was smart about getting money to work for him. By consciously choosing to interface with his rich dad to learn from him, Kiyosaki acquired many thinkings and mindsets of how to become rich, which eventually led him to become successful in life.

So, are your friends to blame for your bulge … and your empty pockets for that matter?  Maybe.

The great thing is you have choice.  If you hang out with a group of successful, positive-minded people who believe in taking responsibility for their lives, you will move to do the same. If you hang out with a bunch of pessimists who think the world is out to get them and that there is nothing worthwhile, you will start descending into the negative whirlpool at some point, even if you are initially a positive individual.

It’s all your choice.

Have you ever revisited a loved place of your childhood?  Ever got yourself so excited with your stories that you were just bursting out of the seams to land in that airport, cross that town’s border, or dine in that establishment again in order to re-live old times?  And finally, you land in that destination only to discover that everything has changed and you’re not sure you actually like it anymore?

I sure have.  And for the past few years, that place for me was the Gold Coast.  Having taken a few years away overseas, followed up by a few more living in the southern regions of Australia, I recently moved back to the place of my youth – the Gold Coast.  And at first, my thoughts were just like that:  “Boy, how things have changed.”

There is much more construction, loads more traffic, there’s a well-despised new water provider, more people, suburbs on the other side of the Pacific Highway; and people have started wearing shoes and collared shirts!   We even have two national football teams that didn’t exist when I last lived here.

Until about six months ago, I could not stomach the thought of returning here – that was until I made a decision to have a look at what these changes could actually bring to my life.  What are the benefits of this change?  Yes, I am on the cusp of Gen Y and Gen X, so of course life is about ‘What’s in it for me?’.  But, it is my life, so why not find out how I could make this great city work on my behalf?

When I looked closely at the elements of the GC that had changed, I was able to notice that these changes had actually brought many more of my favourite things:  Better access to great restaurants, national sporting events on my doorstep, easier transportation to an international airport, and a more diverse group of citizens very dedicated to a balanced lifestyle.

And in addition to the changes I could love, I started more easily seeing the original stuff that I loved:  the very swim-able beaches (Peru’s capital Lima has one of the most amazing coastlines that can not be swum in because of excessive pollution), the character of the old-time locals, my Mum, Montezuma’s at Burleigh and of course. the weather. 

I’m not sure if you’ve ever realised, but change is not something you can avoid – and like the weather, it’s just something we can not control.  That being the case, surely I’m not the only one who has noticed we often do our best to pretend its not happening.   And when we resist change, life can become hard, rather than easy.

You see, by not embracing the new version of the place that fostered my younger years, I was actually living in the past.  And by living in the past, I was missing the awesome things that were going on in the present.

While I still love to wear no shoes, enjoy walking the beach in my togs alone, and am happy to arrive at a friend’s place in my salt-ridden beach dress (MEN READ:  boardies), I love the fact that I can also eat out in some of Queensland’s best restaurants, consume wine farmed from vines in our state, get on a train to Brisbane, and interact with intelligent and savvy business people.

So, by making a decision to explore the benefits of change, I have again embraced a place that is offering me much satisfaction.  I have learnt that making life easier can be as simple as making a decision to think that way. 

What is the change that you’ve most been resisting?  Perhaps it’s time to take another perspective … ?